Kudos to Red Blaster for doing the quotes said by the greasers and preppies, as well as Ivan.
Norton:
- Heyyy!
- I think I still have some of that preppy's blood on me.
Hal:
- You're a handsome stallion aren't ya?
- Lookin' good.
Lucky:
- Lookin' good.
- Still got it, pal.
Peanut:
- Oh yeah! Lola, honey, come to daddy!
- (Mimicking Lola's voice) Ohhh! Laaarry. I can't resist you. You're the best!
Ricky:
- Looking good, Rick. I don't know why she ever left you.
- Just gotta grease the hair, and I am looking SLICK.
Lefty:
- Awesome hair dude, just...awesome.
- How could any chick say no to that?
Vance:
- Vance...how can one guy be so hot?
- Ladies...the make-out master has arrived.
Lola:
- You're beautiful, Lola.
- Eat-your-heart out, boys.
Bif:
- Money, looks...what more could anyone need?
- I'd do me.
Bryce:
- You have to look like money to have money.
- You have to hide your inner loser, Bryce.
Chad:
- Chad! You are delicious!
- This nose job was the best thing I've ever done.
Gord:
- You're DEFINITELY the best dressed, Gord.
- I guess good breeding does show...how nice.
Justin:
- Pleasingly Grecian.
- Damn...I'm handsome.
Parker:
- I'll get a date...I know I will.
- It's not too crooked, is it?
Pinky:
- We look nothing alike...I'm sure!
- Is that a zit?! It better not be a zit!
Tad:
- Let me see...who am I taking down today?
- Okay...Derby wants me to give who the runaround today?
Beatrice:
- One day you are going to be beautiful. Medical technologies are advancing rapidly.
- I want to be a doctor so I can help sick people get better and ugly people happier.
Bucky: A little geek sheet never hurt nobody.
Donald: Maybe one day I’ll grow a beard.
Melvin: Oooh, who’s that sexy man?
Davis:
- Yeah, you look good!
- Not too shabby, if I do say so myself.
Ethan:
- Slick! And slick!
- Wow… now that’s class!
Russell:
- Why does comb always break?
- Maybe Russell need moisturizer.
Tom:
- I know what the deal is. I know why they all stare at me, but I can’t let them know I know. No.
- Stupid mirror! This mirror is bent or something! It makes me look like I’m sad, which I’m obviously not.
Trent:
- You’re a star. You’re a star. You’re a star.
- Girls, they looove meee!
Troy:
- My muscles are so hot!
- I feel so pumped up right now!
Wade:
- Lookin’ pretty fly!
- Chicks will dig this look! Man, I’m hot!
Bo:
- Yeah, you know you got it!
- Mm, mm!
Casey:
- I gotta hit the gym again.
- I’ll get some. Yeah, I’ll get some!
Damon:
- I wanna see what everyone sees in Ted. “Look at me, I’m magnificent!”
- I really am a handsome man!
Dan:
- Hm. I need some more work on the shoulders.
- Aw man, I got a zit right on my chin!
Juri:
- I think my chest is bigger!
- Ooh, you are so strong and manly!
Kirby:
- K is for clean, I is for irresistible, R is for…
- Excellent, no new pimples.
Luis:
- Those muscles are rock hard man.
- (imitating female voice) “Oooh Luis, those are the hardest muscles I ever saw!”
Mandy:
- God, I am so hot.
- Eat your heart out, boys!
Angie:
- Should I dye my hair?
- Why doesn't he notice me?
Christy:
- I wonder if washing your face makes you wrinkle.
- I’m so young and full of hope.
Constantinos:
- Almost touching again. Time for the tweezers.
- I’m miserable!
Eunice:
- You just gotta get that cowlick down.
- I look… ! Okay. Ugh. Who am I kidding, I look so stupid.
Gloria:
- I think I look fairly tidy and meticulous now!
- A proper academia must look the part.
Gordon:
- Just two more hairs and it’ll be perfect!
- Check that out! Getting some badass moustache hairs. Yeah!
Ivan:
- I got bags under my bags.
- I need more sleep.
Karen:
- I must have grown another inch.
- I don’t know why I bother.
Lance:
- You gotta grow a mean ass goatee! Yeah! That’d set the ladies off!
- Maybe I should grow a flattop. It’s so out, it’s cool!
Melody: I wish they’d grow faster.
- What’s the point? He doesn’t like me.
Pedro: How does this work again?
- Okay, how do I do this?
Ray:
- People like me. People like me. If I believe it, it will come true.
- *sigh* What are you going to do?
Sheldon:
- I don’t look like a weasel…
- Do I really have a funny face?
Trevor:
- You don’t look half bad!
- Am I getting fat?
Clint:
- What did she mean “scruffy lookin’?”
- Dark, handsome, and totally dangerous.
Duncan:
- Hey, handsome.
- Is that a pimple? I hope that’s not a pimple…
Gurney:
- You rock!
- I rock!
Jerry:
- Lookin’ smooth, Jerry!
- Well, I always knew I’d enter politics from a young age.
Leon:
- You got it going on! Oh yeah, baby!
- I need some… facial scars or something.
Omar:
- Ugh, I so need another mirror.
- Did this mirror come from the funhouse?
Otto:
- What the hell is that?
- I need more tattoos.
Zoe:
- Gotta do something about that hair.
- Hello, tough girl.